For Crying Out Loud
by thorsfriend
Summary: An accident causes the highly decorated leader of SG1 to become a child, how will Jack cope, what will happen next as the NID/Trust and all the other bad guys seem to want to get their hands on the shortened Colonel. How will Hammond, and the SGC cope. PAUSED
1. Chapter 1

-1AN:- I have always wanted to write a story where one of the main characters gets down sized, so here goes all feedback is welcome but please do not flame me.

"For crying out loud." Jack snapped looking down at his body.

"Ermm Jack is that you." Daniel questioned looking down at the figure of his friend.

"Yes Daniel it's me, and what did you touch this time." Jack tried to stay calm as he looked at his own body.

"It was an accident I never meant for this to happen." Daniel stuttered as Jack began to approach him.

"Look at me Daniel, I've been minified again, only this time there's no clone or Loki involved." Jack yelled.

Daniel looked shocked, starring at his best friend he noted the soft brown locks with no hint of silver, the fact that Jack also appeared to be really small, Daniel was no judge of children's ages but he thought Jack maybe about five, he could even be possibly younger.

"This is so not good." Daniel had not meant to say that out loud as Jack glared at him.

"State the obvious why don't you." Jack snarled, reaching down to grab at his trousers which he had to hold up with both small hands.

"I think I'll radio Sam and Teal'c." Daniel stated.

"Great idea. " Jack drew himself up to his full but reduced height. "I have got to hear how you explain this to them."

"Sam, Teal'c you need to come back to the temple." Daniel spoke into the radio trying to avoid smiling at Jack who seemed to be fighting a losing battle keeping boots and trousers on.

"Is there a problem DanielJackson? Teal'c strong voice enquired.

"Just a small one, owwww Jack. Sam you need to get back her as quick as you can." Daniel replied sounding slightly breathless

"Right Daniel where 10 minutes from you, can you give me any idea of the problem, is the Colonel alright?" Sam asked wondering why SG1's leader had left it to Daniel to make radio contact.

Breaking contact with Sam and Teal'c Daniel turned to Jack, he surveyed the pacing man/boy.

"Jack I'm sorry I didn't mean to joke about this." Daniel sincerely apologised.

Look at me Daniel, I've shrunk, I look like a kid but I'm still me. Who is going to take me serious when I look like this. Atleast when Loki did a mini me clone he had some height to him." Jack threw his hands in the air in disgust.

"Great help me do something with these clothes, I don't want Carter to see me like this." Jack looked at his bottom half of his BDU's and his underwear which had pooled at his feet.

"How, we going to do this then?" Daniel rubbed his head in thought.

"My friend duct tape." Jack started rooting in his pack.

Daniel stifled a nervous giggle as he watched his bare arsed friend finally locate the welcome roll of duct tape.

"Hurry up Daniel. Carter will be here soon." Jack snapped holding the duct tape out.

Wrapping the duct tape like a belt around the adult sized boxer shorts, Daniel managed to make them cover Jack, leaving just his t-shirt on which came to Jack's knees, his modesty was protected.

Unknown to the Jack and Daniel, Sam and Teal'c had arrived and while Teal'c was quietly assessing the scene, Sam was struck down with shock. Suddenly Jack's head whipped up to stare at his 2IC.

"Carter?" Jack tilted his head in Sam's direction.

"Holy Hannah!!"


	2. Chapter 2

-1Oops forgot this in last chapter.

Standard disclaimer do not own any of the Stargate characters(waaaah).

AN: Thanks for the reviews and messages. Nyx Ro I have no intention of making Daniel anything but the competent man that he is, as yet I have not decided what direction this fic is taking, that's one of the reasons that I have not SJ shipped it or anything. I just know that hopefully there will be humour and action.

--SG1--SG1--SG1--SG--SG1--

Previously on SG1:

"Holy Hannah."

--SG1--SG1--SG1--SG--SG1--

Sam shook her head as if to clear it.

"Yes Carter it's really me." Jack stood as tall as he could considering the situation.

"Daniel what's going on." Sam asked moving towards them both.

"Carter to cut a long story short, Daniel touch something he shouldn't." Jack flailed his arms around to emphasise the point.

"Jack you could have triggered something." Daniel defended himself.

"Didn't" Jack retorted.

"Did" Daniel responded.

"Didn't"

"Did."

"Didn't"

"Did."

The arguing pair were now stood toe to toe with Jack glaring up at Daniel who glared right back at him.

"Colonel, erm Daniel." Sam tried to get there attention.

"Didn't"

"Did."

"OK that's enough guys." Sam stood with her hands on her hips shaking her head as once again they ignored her.

"Didn't"

"Did."

"Quiet." yelled Sam.

"What's the matter Sam?" Daniel asked looking confused.

"Yeah what's the problem?" Jack stared at Sam.

"I believe MajorCarter is annoyed with your bickering." Teal'c announced.

"Right." Jack quipped. "I think we need to return to SGC, Daniel are you ready to go?"

"Yes I have taken video and photographs of everything here where the change happened." Daniel moved to his pack and started to fill it with his equipment.

Jack walked over to his pack and began putting his unnecessary clothes away, he reached out to move his P90 when Sam stopped him.

"I'll take that Sir." Sam did not look him in the eye.

"I can carry my weapon Major." Jack growled, which sounded strange coming from his small mouth.

"Sir I think it will be to heavy and anyway Teal'c will have to carry you back to the Stargate as you have no boots on." Sam reasonably pointed out.

"Indeed O'Neill it will be my honour to carry you to the Stargate." Teal'c bowed his head.

"That is unless you want me to carry you." Daniel insincerely offered.

"I can still kill you Daniel." Jack retorted, "I may be small but you have to sleep sometime Space Monkey."

Teal'c scooped up his brother in arms, as SG1 began the trek back to the Stargate.

--SG1--SG1--SG1--SG--SG1--

"For crying out loud." Jack exclaimed.

As the group had been walking for ten minutes when Jack had squirmed to get comfy in the Jaffa's arms, he happened to glance to the sky to see a Goauld mothership begin to appear.

"Indeed O'Neill, I see it." Teal'c began to move faster with his precious cargo.

In the distance the sound of the Stargate activating could be heard, Sam stopped to assess the situation.

"Goauld that's all we need." Jack spoke from the safety of Teal'c's arms.

"Sir I think Teal'c should scout out the Stargate while we find somewhere to hide." Sam proposed.

"I agree, Teal'c gather intel and the report back." Jack ordered.

Teal'c moved off silently to find out what was happening at the Stargate, the Goauld mothership flew over the remaining members of SG1 and appeared to land not far from the Stargate.

"Jack I saw some caves over there." Daniel pointed towards them. "Maybe we should wait there."

Jack was about to speak when suddenly he swung round turning in the direction they had walked from, just as he was about to speak a voice boomed out.

"Kree!!"

"Oh for crying out loud."


End file.
